Jessy's Place

mini-tuffs theveryworstthing

theveryworstthing

drawing goblins for goblin story thing maybe? here are some short goblin bios.

The Rat Princess: a career criminal who’s so good at what she does that the ultra-rich see being robbed by her as a status symbol/security check. her biggest claim to fame is once stealing a diamond as big as her head and not having the theft discovered until it was later found in a pawn shop. she pawned it for half what it was worth and left a note for the owner that simply read, “your carpets are ugly and your guards are overpaid.” when the duke she had robbed made a fuss asking for her arrest she somehow got back onto his property and wrote “This bitch can’t handle critique” on the side of his mansion. she’s kind of the worst.

Strawberry Knife: the richest goblin. how did she get so rich? how does she stay so rich? nobody knows. what they do know is that she breeds some fancy ass frogs. those frogs are seriously the best like wow. also? really nice suits.

The King Eater: a simple goblin mother who once straight up ate a king. not by herself of course, she has kids to feed and he was as fat as he was terrible at being a king. she’s actually not the first king eater as eating terrible kings who wouldn’t step down used to be an old goblin tradition. with the rise of humans in goblin territories the old laws died out and positions of power were now handed down through families instead of given to the most fit for the job or won through knife fights. long story short she was really into arcane law, the people were starving, and the king got ate.

yay goblins.